An excellent example as how to resolve conflict.

 

https://www.9marks.org/conversations/on-pastoral-public-tone-with-kevin-deyoung-pastors-talk-ep-245/

In this Pastors Talk episode, Jonathan Leeman (9Marks) interviews Mark Dever (Baptist) and Kevin DeYoung (Reformed) on pastoral, public tone; and the correction of brothers. This interview also gives help to disagreeing in public.

Principles:

1. The offended acted quickly when he saw/heard something that was wrong.
2. The offended got counsel from others what to do. This is not gossip.
3. The offended wrote directly in a clear, honest way. He wrote because he could articulate his concerns clearly and carefully.
4. The offended was very gracious when the offender apologized.
5. The offender know that the one taking offence. should be happy that he grow and learn by this. 
6. They knew each other well, by character thus having confidence that their concerns would be handled graciously and seriously.
7. The offender called right away after receiving the rebuke and repented.
8. The offender, when realizing his error did what he could to make it right. 
9. The effectiveness of the resolution was directly based on the good relationship of the parties and the trust that they could speak of such things confidently. There is wisdom to know how a rebuke might land. 
10. To be able to communicate in such manner is to respect the other party and assume that they will hear what they’re saying.  He is assuming that the other will not take it out of context, make light of it, be resentful toward it.

Build the kind of relationships that this level of discussion can take place. Unfortunately I have experienced several significant issues that I feel unable to address with a person because their response to conflict has been defensiveness, counter-attack, failure to really listen to my concerns, making light of it, or oppositely becoming distant and resentful.

I pray today that if I am that way, the Lord will hear my repentance and give grace.

Are You Blessed, Or Are You Trying To Be Blessed?

Have you heard the Beatitudes preached this way:“If you are poor in spirit enough, if you are sad enough, if you are hungering and thirsting enough, THEN, you will be blessed.”

The sermon sounds like a conditional reward.  If you are this, you get that.  But “this word [blessed] affirms a state of blessing that already exists. Each beatitude declares that a group of people usually regarded as afflicted is actually blessed.” (TOW, Bible Commentary) The word blessed is an adjectival noun, meaning that it serves as an indicative and a descriptive. The Bible describes a people who are called. They are “the” called indicating who they are; and they are the “called” noting the action being done to them.  So it is with the Blessed.  They are THE blessed indicating who they are by description and they are the blessed indicating what is happening to them.  Matthew uses the word ‘blessed’ in both ways.  

One might successfully argue that we cannot be Christians unless we are poor in spirit, or mourn over sin.  Jesus simply declares that those people are already blessed.  Non-Christians would think otherwise.  To the contrary Jesus is saying to us as citizens of His kingdom that you are blessed, despite the fact of being poor in spirit, persecuted, hungry — hungering for righteousness, etc. You are a blessed people, not a cursed people.  And then He adds to each of the eight a promise connected with that assertion.  To personalize the text one might say: “My meekness is not the condition of the cursed, it is the condition of the blessed.  Therefore the promise to us (Blessed is in the plural) that we all who are meek will inherit the earth.”  

Perhaps you will read the Beatitudes differently and “rejoice and be glad”.